Notepad on Life

August 27, 2011

The scariest words a drinker will hear – “Brewed in the UK”

Filed under: Advertising,business,Consumer,Drink,foreign — - @ 10:02 am

The essence of Luton

Welcome to Brahma; latest in a long line of serial offenders brought to you by the big-league brewing industry.

It is, the bottle informs me, Brazilian Beer since 1888 and brewed “to the authentic Brazilian recipe”.

Exotic as it sounds, it is also cursed by the most damning phrase any drinker will ever hear – “Brewed in the UK”. I knew its father, you know: “Brewed under licence”.

We’ve been here for 30 years now and as one who has tasted the real thing where the likes of Castlemaine, Molson and Budweiser are concerned and knows only too well how “Brewed in the UK” usually translates as “nothing like the original”, I call hogwash on that “authentic Brazilian recipe” claim.

From the very first sip, I detect no hint of Copacabana or samba. I detect what I always do in a bottle bearing the “Brewed in the UK” curse: bland, unremarkable beer that tastes just like all the other beers that result whenever big brewers decide that they can find the taste of Brazil, America or Canada by going no further than Burton on Trent or Luton.

Whatever the difference may be between this ludicrous fiction and those far eastern hawkers who flog fake Rolex, I’m struggling to spot it.

…………………………………………………..

Brazil’s Brahma beer goes global – in the company’s defence, it does at least come right out with it in this masterpiece of corporate-speak. I considered satirising the quotes from Devin Kelly, Inbev’s vice-president for global brands, but realised I couldn’t possibly improve on the original.

[Pic courtesy of timkas23]
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