Notepad on Life

March 24, 2014

Movie credits do credit to no-one

Filed under: animals,Cinema,Tobacco — - @ 9:00 am
Tags: ,
Sandra Bullock at the premiere for The Proposal

Sandra Bullock (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

From the closing credits in the excellent film Gravity:

“No person or entity associated with this film received payment or anything in value, or entered into any agreement, in connection with the depiction of tobacco products”

Not sure I actually recall Sandra Bullock pausing to drag on a Camel while mulling over her options but then the fact this disclaimer isn’t even necessary here only highlights the fawning to the self-appointed guardians of civic propriety that is increasingly common in the scrolling small print at the end of Hollywood’s latest. What’s the matter, anti-smoking zealots: peeved at the attention the animal-lovers were getting? Saw all those prissy “No animals were harmed in the making of this film” assurances and decided it was time you were getting some love?

Next time Seth MacFarlane and his fellow iconoclasts are looking for new sacred cows to slaughter (figure of speech, PETA) giving the self-righteous the finger with credits of a – shall we say – counter-revolutionary thrust would would not only go down well among many patrons, I suspect, but would also ensure that the unit accountant/floor sweeper/bricklayer’s name-check hits the screen while there are still people around to see it.

A few suggestions…

“So many animals were harmed in the making of this film, the abattoir cancelled staff leave for a month.”

“Unwanted pet? Auditions now open for our next production, When Puppies and Semtex Collide”

“100 per cent of all tobacco products used in this film were superfluous to plotline or character development. And when we say ‘tobacco’…”

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1 Comment »

  1. […] grumbled before about the surfeit of useless information once closing credits roll up the big […]

    Pingback by Movie credits could use a spoiler alert | Notepad on Life — October 21, 2014 @ 9:10 am | Reply

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